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Thursday, February 28, 2013

Who could be mad at that face?

Many times I am questioned by folks who ponder "How do you know what to blog about?" My answer is always "I just know what will translate well, certain aspects make it a good story". Sometimes it is suggested that I blog about a specific event and I choose not to...an example being the time we were sitting down to dinner with friends (the first time we have left Senia Mae overnight with Grammy babysitting at our house) and the phone rings just as our friends are asking why we don't do this more often. I pick up my cell to hear a frantic, panic stricken Grammy shouting "Senia Mae is locked in the car....." Reason number one why we don't do this more often. I don't want to blog about it because I am still traumatized over it as a mother, even though I do now admit that the story is funny. But this next one is funnier.

It's a Thursday night, we are all exhausted from a busy day and eventful potluck dinner, returning home and trying to quickly get the toddler to bed. Many people have children who will fall asleep in the car and can be easily and effortlessly transported right into bed. Not us. Our kid seems to have her batteries recharged as soon as she crosses the threshold into the kitchen! We normally give her a minute or two to wind down and do her "stuff". Lately this has been sitting on her potty while trying to do poopie as she sings loudly and bosses around some imaginary friends lurking around in the bathroom. Today was no different, she was doing her "stuff" and Kim and I thought we could take a quick moment to move the stacked washer and dryer out of the way for the contractor who was arriving in the morning to work in the utility closet.

Picture this: Kim behind the 6 foot high unit with a dolly tugging to get the heavy set balanced and positioned correctly on the wheels. I am on the other side pushing the uneven washer with one hand while holding the drain hose the other hand, trying in vain to keep it in a yellow pail catching the leaking drips so they do not get on the floor. Kim is getting frustrated with me because I am not carrying out the task that is expected of me even though I think that I am...there is grunting and groaning and agitation, you get the picture. Just as we get the unit properly balanced on the dolly and actually have it rolling a couple of inches Senia Mae walks out of the bathroom half naked holding up her hand. "What's this?" she asks innocently as she holds up the plastic inserter of a tampon that had already been used and placed in the trash. Kim's eyes flash open in horror as her germ-o-phobe brain kicks into its fight or flight defense mode, dropping the washer mid stroke and chasing Senia Mae into the bathroom screeching "That's trash, it's dirty, we don't touch it, trash stays in the trash can, We don't take it out!!!!", dragging our child to the sink scrubbing her hands as if she had touched some type of skin burning acid.

I follow the commotion, slowly entering the bathroom as Senia Mae bursts into tears, REAL tears..."Am I in trouble?" The tears pour down her reddening face as her lower lip sticks out in that way only toddlers can do. She is devastated at the fact that something that she did was unacceptable to us. I grab her into my arms caressing her head, soothing her with gentle words saying we were not mad at her and that Mommy just got overly excited about her rummaging through the trash...I am saying all this with her head resting in my bosom so that she cannot see that I am making every effort not to pee because I am laughing so hard and holding it in so she will not be aware of my mixed emotions. This is when you need hidden video cameras! The whole thing was absolutely hilarious...us moving the washer...enter kid holding tampon...exit fanatical germ focused mother...kid busts into tears...You just can't write this stuff, you have to live it.

Fortunately she did calm down after ten minutes of consoling and repeating that we were indeed not mad at her. We all agreed that it is a good idea to stay clear of any type of trash, even if it does look interesting. You never really know what you are going to find!

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